It can be so wonderful to start dating somebody new. You meet on a free internet dating site, you feel a flash of attraction. Then you start to talk and get to know each other. Sooner than you might think, you're ready to open up to them, sharing your feelings and thoughts about, well, everything. Or almost everything. Because no matter how you met --in a support group or an internet dating site-- there are some things that you should never talk about with a new boyfriend. That is, unless you want to kiss your relationship (or at least his interest for the evening) goodbye.
Subject 1: Celebrity Gossip
I know very few straight men who either know or care anything about what's going on in the lives of celebrities. So even if you're addicted to TMZ or other celebrity gossip websites, keep it quiet from your new boyfriend. There are very few things liable to turn him off more quickly than a tirade about how skinny Renee Zellweger has gotten or how Jennifer Aniston's new boyfriend keeps jerking her around. Unless he brings up the celebrity gossip first, keep quiet about your dirty little interest as long as you can.
Subject 2: Your Ex
This seems like simple common sense, right? Actually, you'd be surprised to know how many women open up far too much about their ex. It doesn't matter if the things you have to say about your ex are negative ones or positive ones, you need to keep ex-related comments to a minimum. If you have something important to say about him or your time together, there's a time to say it. But if conversation leads you to describe a trait of or a memory with your ex, bite your tongue. Just because he used to be obsessed with slasher flicks doesn't mean your new guy has to hear about it while you're at the video store.
Subject 3: Your low self-esteem
Most women have issues with their self esteem and, more commonly, with their body image. But these are subjects you share with commiserating girlfriends, not with your boyfriend. You might think that a certain skirt makes you look fat or you might feel bad about your body in general. But agonizing about it in front of your boyfriend will turn him off much more quickly than whatever "bad" body feature you're worried about. Besides, he probably doesn't even notice your flaws; you're the one who worries about them, not him. So don't saddle him with your body image baggage.
Subject 4: Others' relationships
It's natural to be interested in the ups and downs of your friends' or family's love lives. But it's best to keep it to yourself, or reserve the subject for chatting with your girlfriends. Most men couldn't care less who your best friend is internet dating or how your cousin's wedding plans are going. This is the kind of conversation that seems pre-planned to bore your boyfriend silly. Even if the details of your friends' lives are fascinating to you, they're probably too much information (TMI!) for him. Leave them at home when you go out.
Subject 5: Man trash-talk
Every woman has probably felt jerked around by men at some point in her life. But that doesn't make talking about those feelings acceptable with a new man. Women who spend a lot of time forming and expressing negative opinions of men aren't exactly attractive to the gender in question. So if you think all of the world's ills can be blamed on the violence of men, keep it to yourself. It's not likely to make your boyfriend feel well-disposed towards you. And it may just make him turn and run the other direction.
