One of the best things about free internet dating is that you meet people from all walks of life. Doctors, showgirls, cashiers, veterinarians, you name it. And you also meet people from all over the world. It may be more practical to try to find somebody who lives close to you on an internet dating site, but that doesn't mean things always work that way. There's something so attractive about somebody from a culture different from yours. They're unusual, they're mysterious, they're special. Simply put, they're sexy.
They're also, sometimes, hard to communicate with. When you start dating somebody from a different country, you of course have to keep in mind cultural and language differences when you talk to each other. Not everything somebody says in a second language means what they think it means, and this kind of relationship can be rife with miscommunication. This is something most multi-cultural couples are prepared for. But what you don't prepare for, generally, is the cultural differences in simple everyday body language.
Most of what you say to another person is nonverbal. And while some body language is universal, some of it is not. Want to make sure your body language isn't saying something different from what you think it says? Read on for some ways in which different cultures see body language.
Eye contact.
In much of the western world, making steady eye contact with the person you're talking to is a way to show that you respect them, that you're trustworthy, and that you're listening to what they have to say. But while this sort of nonverbal language is expected in the U.S., Canada, and most of Europe, it can actually be offensive to some other cultures. In China, for instance, many think that direct eye contact shows aggression and disrespect, not consideration and respect.
Gesturing.
If you've ever watched a Spanish or Italian family have an animated conversation, chances are you saw a lot of gesturing and talking with your hands. And while most cultures have plenty of hand gestures, not all of those gestures are used in the same way. In the Arab world, for instance a handshake is not at all firm, and is used not just when meeting somebody for the first time, but every time you meet them-- even if it's ten times in one day. The symbol for OK used by Americans is used by Greeks to express an obscenity. In some cultures, it can also be rude to point in a certain way, or make other specific gestures. So if you're not sure what gesture to use with somebody you're dating, don't use one at all-- especially if you're outside your own country.
Personal space.
Of all the things talked about here, personal space is probably the one perceived most differently from culture to culture. In some cultures, such as in North America and much of Europe personal space is a very valuable thing, and people tend to both give and expect plenty of it. Especially in the United States, you should generally expect to give and be given an arm's length or more of space when you're talking to somebody. But it doesn't work that way in every culture. In some cultures, people aren't as sensitive about having space between themselves and the people they're speaking with. The best way to gauge whether or not you're getting or giving enough personal space? Pay attention to when your date steps away from you, or make an effort to step away from them when they get too close.
When you're internet dating, things like body language can't have any effect on your relationship or your communication. But after you meet in person, you might be surprised at the misunderstandings that can arise from a simple word or gesture. And while you can't guarantee that these sorts of misunderstandings will never happen, being educated about what to expect can keep them to a minimum.
