There are millions and millions of people logging onto free internet dating websites like Datepad, looking for a love, or an encounter, or just a hot date. Heck, that's why you joined in the first place, right? But because there are so many millions searching for love online, the process of catching the interest of the good ones becomes something of a numbers game.
Just as in live dating, the role of "making the first move" tends to fall to the man in the internet dating world. But because of the sheer number of other men online, you have to work extra hard to capture a woman's attention. After all, a beautiful woman in a bar might talk to 2, 5, even 10 men on a Saturday night. But a beautiful woman on a dating site might get hundreds of emails in the course of a week. That's a lot of competition.
Want to capture her attention and really boost your chances of a positive response online? Here's how.
Write a great profile. Obvious, right? You would think so, but there are still millions of people out there with sub-par profiles. So I'm willing to belabor the point: take the time to compose an honest, specific, funny, energetic profile. Then have some friends read it and edit, edit, edit. After your message, your profile is the first thing she'll look at when deciding whether or not to respond. It has to be a good one.
Update your profile daily. This goes along great with the previous tip! If you have to keep editing your profile to make it the best you can be, you can go in and make small changes every day. Why? Because on most internet dating sites, the newest or most recently edited profiles are going to be at the top of the listings, which gives you a great chance of being contacted first.
Check for new profiles daily. When a woman joins an internet dating site, there's a small window of time during which you'll be one of the first guys to contact her. Try to get through that window if you can. She's bound to notice you a lot more if you're the 3rd guy to respond to her profile than if you're the 303rd.
Write emails with energy. Composing a bunch of emails to contact women who may never even respond might seem like a total waste of effort. But it's not. Take the time to compose a fun, energetic email for each woman that you contact. While you can have a few lines (or a description about yourself) that you tend to use, if you write each email fresh it'll show. Be specific and let your personality show through in your email. "Hey, I'm Adam and I love your profile. I think you're a great lady and we might make a perfect match," is never going to cut it.
Be Specific. Both on your internet dating profile and in your first message or email, be specific about what you like and who you are. What specific element of her profile attracted you to her? What is it that you're looking for in a girl, and why?
Be Yourself-- but Better. When it comes to sending that first message to a girl who's caught your eye, honesty is the best policy. But that doesn't mean you need to let all your warts hang out for her to see. If you're a cocky tough guy, let that show through in your first message. If you're an intellectual or a poet, let her see that, instead. Personality is important, and you want her to see as much of yours as she can. This will not only capture her attention, it will also increase the chance that the women who respond are ones that find your personality type attractive.
In short, show her the best of what you are, and make it real. If she can see you as a real person instead of simply a name and a spammy message on her computer screen, there's a pretty good chance you'll get a response. And that's the whole point of contacting her in the first place, right?
