It's funny how similar free internet dating is to searching for a job. You have your CV or resume (your profile), you have your perfect match in mind, and you've got to market yourself just right in order to land the one you want. Everybody knows that it's important to be honest and colorful on their internet dating profile. But most online daters never really learn how to truly sell themselves on an online profile. Marketing yourself to a potential partner can be a complex business, requiring honesty and balance and focus.
No, talking about finding love in terms of "marketing" doesn't sound very romantic. But really, the marketing part is all about getting that click... the rest is up to you.
Age and appearance.
First off, there's no reason to lie about your age on an online profile. Many older daters have already tried dating younger people (especially the men), and after plenty of tried and failed relationships, most are looking for somebody their own age. Somebody they can relate to. Hiding your age to appear more attractive just opens you up to the kind of shallow people you don't want to be with anyway-- and who aren't really looking for you.
The truth is, most men (and of course most women) don't really want somebody younger than themselves (though some do). In fact, statistics show that most people ultimately marry somebody close to their own age. What a potential partner does want, though, is somebody who takes care of themselves and values their appearance. If you can do that, you should have no problem being open with your age-- after all, you have to remember that your audience is a man or woman close to your own age, as well.
Really, appearance is generally more important than age-- it's an integral part of attraction. But no matter what you look like, fudging about your appearance to get more responses is never going to work in the long run. Even if they would be interested in you otherwise, knowing that you've lied on your internet dating profile will almost definitely turn any potential partners off. Remember, the whole purpose behind an internet dating profile is to market yourself to your audience. So no, by being honest about your age and weight you're not going to attract a person who wants a fresh-faced young model. But that's okay... because a person like that isn't who you're looking for. Of course you want to impress; but never forget who your audience is.
And no matter what you look like, you can use colorful wording on your profile to sell yourself without having to be dishonest. "Creamy skinned," after all, is going to sound a lot more attractive than just "pale."
Personality.
While your looks are probably the first thing that will capture their attention, it's your personality that will keep it. Everyone has elements of their personality that people in their target internet dating audience will admire. It's just a matter of making those traits visible on your profile.
A great way to display yourself as a complete and interesting person is to balance out the way you describe yourself. If you mention that you have a Star Trek obsession, also mention that you run three miles a day and read poetry. Balance your light and silly attributes with your more serious ones to give potential dates a clear and appealing picture. The more somebody sees you as a well-rounded individual, the more interested they'll be in clicking that sexy little "Message" button on your profile.
In short, the more specific, unique-to-you details you provide, the more interest your internet dating profile will garner. After all, most people enjoy things like traveling or going to the movies. Instead, talk about the things that set you apart, and talk about them in specific rather than in general ways.
Appealing to Your Audience
The most important thing to remember when creating your internet dating profile is (and yes, it deserves repeating) to remember your target audience. What kind of person are you trying to attract? How old are they, and of what gender? You know how you can behave a little differently depending on who you're with at the moment? Well, your profile is similar; there are hundreds of different ways to describe yourself. You need to pick the right one for the people you're specifically talking to.
It's all too easy to lose focus while writing an internet dating profile, and end up with something that a new best friend might love... but that will turn off the very person you're looking to attract romantically. Remember, you need to show as many sides of your character as you can, and to show them in a way that will make them attractive to somebody of the opposite sex. Sure "I'm a hair and makeup junkie," might make you appealing if you're searching for a cool girl to go shopping with... but it sends the wrong message to a man. "I take good care of my appearance," however, tells a completely different story.
The truth is, you can't please everybody with your profile. And nor should you try. Instead, think about the ideal person to come along and read about you, and try to appeal to him or her, instead. You're not marketing yourself to everybody on Datepad. You just need to market yourself to the person you want to end up with. Sometimes a narrow focus can be a good thing-- and will let you say just what you want to just the right person. Good luck!
Shellygurl21
41 / Female
Comments: 1
Posted on May 17, 2009, 2:50 pm
Just be yourself there is always someone for someone. shellygurl21
Posted on May 26, 2009, 3:37 am
Good point, Shellygurl! If you're not yourself, how can you expect to find somebody who will be happy with the real you?
Watsup
31 / Male
Comments: 2
Posted on July 7, 2009, 9:17 pm
Don't lie. it can just end up bad if you do.
