In a lot of ways, internet dating is safer than traditional dating. You get to spend a lot of time getting feel for somebody before you meet him in person. You get to dictate the terms of your first meeting, and maintain a higher level of control than you might otherwise. But no dating method is foolproof, and the anonymity of internet dating can occasionally be dangerous for women. Fortunately, there are ways to make online dating safer for everybody involved.
1. Keep an eye on their story. When you're dating somebody over the Internet, you'll spend a lot of time talking to each other about your lives and jobs and families and all of that get-to-know-you stuff. When you do this with a man, be sure to watch his story for any inconsistencies. If a man you're chatting with gives inconsistent information about his job, age, family, or anything else, a red flag should go up. If what you hear isn't consistent, there's a good chance that it isn't true.
2. Be anonymous. When you're Internet dating and just getting to know somebody, it's best to avoid using any real information about yourself. Now, this doesn't mean you should lie. But it does mean that you shouldn't give out your full name, your address, or your place of work to people you've just met online. While most of the people you'll meet online are perfectly legit, there are also some out there that cannot be trusted. Don't let a man know who you are or give him any indication of how to find you until you're sure you can trust him. And remember: if he presses you for personal information before you're comfortable giving it, you should drop him immediately.
3. Use free email. Even if your personal email doesn't contain your full name, people you speak to online can use it to find you. With your personal email address, online predators can use the information it provides to get your phone number and even your home address. Using a free email service with an incomplete version of your name (first name only!) is generally safest.
4. Talk on the phone. While chatting online can be a great way to get to know somebody when Internet dating, a lot of things can hide behind a type-written conversation. If you develop a connection with a man online, it's a very good idea to speak to him on the telephone before meeting him in person. Generally, it's much easier to tell if there's something a little "off" about somebody when you speak to them live. Online it's much harder.
When you do talk on the phone, either use a prepaid cell phone with a blocked number or payphone, and do the calling yourself. With your home phone or cell phone number, it's all-too-easy for a predator to find out your home address.
5. Request photos. Another good way to gauge the legitimacy of somebody you're Internet dating is to look at photos. Ask to see multiple photos of that person in multiple settings. If those photos seem to present a real and normal person that fits in with the description he gave you, you can feel more comfortable moving on to the next step. If a man you're chatting with consistently avoids providing a photo, it should be a red flag. It may be that he's simply uncomfortable about his looks... but it may also be that he's hiding something.
6. Choose a safe place. This should be obvious, but more women than you might think don't choose to meet their Internet dating partner in a safe, public place. It's best to meet somewhere bright, public, and no-pressure, such as a coffee shop. It's also important to use your own transportation, and let somebody know where you're going --and who with-- before you leave the house.
