Twelve Types of Men to Avoid

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Frogs that won't become your Prince

By Amie ◊ Jan 28, 2008 ◊ Published in Dating ◊ 3 Comments

These 12 types of men are out there and you probably have crossed paths with them. I certainly have! Yes, looking for your prince will lead you to a few frogs but, the road taking you there can be an interesting and entertaining one if you keep a positive attitude. For every man I think you should avoid, there are at least 10 others who will knock your socks off. It's all about the chemistry, but that's another article. Enjoy the journey, but keep in mind some of the following Mr.'s who may really be that frog disguising himself as your prince.

Mr. I Spend More Time Getting Ready Than You

Egos are one thing, vanity is another. We know men need a mirror to shave, check their physique and have a last minute look at their hair, and that's okay. It's a woman's job, however, to let men know when they have unsightly nose, ear and brow hairs. We enjoy preening our men. If this Mr. is always looking in the mirror, he won't have as much time for you, and besides that, it's just wrong. Women first discovered their reflection in Roman times by looking in the still water of a pond, thus we lay our claim to the mirror. Mirrors are for women.

Mr. Don't Touch Me I Have Issues

If he's telling you he sleeps in his t-shirt and boxers with pyjama pants on and the covers wrapped around him because he likes to be cozy and feel secure, watch out! If you reach over in a restaurant to lovingly rub his sore shoulder and he pulls away and says "Not in public", be wary. Intimacy is found in every aspect of a relationship, inside the bedroom and outside of it as well. These issues tend to run deep. Don't you deserve a man who has let go of his fears, his past failures and pain and feels comfortable with himself?

Mr. Come On I Wanna Lay Ya

Have you ever had that wandering hand under your blouse on your second date when you were expecting only a sweet goodnight kiss? Or, had a man finally confess that he is married, that he's never wanted to do this before but he's just so into you and, he's so lonely? What about the man who said "Baby, you can't keep me waiting very much longer" after just a few dates? Oh! How can we forget about the guy who wants to take you away before you even know his last name. This Mr. wants one thing, and it isn't a relationship with you. Why do so many men think that a kiss equates to us wanting sex? If he really digs you he will wait, if that's what you want, then you will know you have the real thing. Only you can decide when the right time is for taking your relationship to the next level. For me, it would be when we are both off the market and working towards finding that everlasting love.

Mr. My Name Is Dick, I Am Unemployed And I Live With My Parents

Which of these three don't you get? Does emotionally crippled come to mind? These men are users and are incapable of looking after themselves; trust me, it can be this way at any age. We want strong capable Mr.’s who have been weaned. Men that aren't making excuses for their excessive neediness. If they offer you an explanation, don't trust them, just run!

Mr. Oops, I Forgot My Wallet

You meet for a drink and things are progressing nicely. Somehow you find yourself talked into joining him for dinner (poor thing hasn't had a thing to eat since breakfast and wouldn't mind grabbing a bite) and then he insists on ordering an extra special bottle of wine, tapas, an expensive meal (lobster! I never order lobster) and desert with a 12 year old tawny port. Get the picture? "Oh Shit!" (Mr. exclaims) I must have forgotten my wallet at my lawyer's office this afternoon. Will you cover this and I promise to write you a cheque or I can give you the cash the next time I see you?" What are you going to do? Wash dishes? I didn't. I paid! I felt so put on the spot that I forgot to take a deep breathe and think about how I could handle this embarrassing situation. If I had, I would have told that Mr., "Sure, no problem", while politely excusing myself. "First, I really must use the ladies room. I will be right back". Grabbing my purse and coat (my lipstick is in the pocket), I would have hit the restroom then casually strolled out of the restaurant after a few minutes making sure he didn't spot me. Unlike me, if you think before you speak, you will be able to count your blessings instead of how much you would have had to leave for the tip.

Mr. I Love Your Purse...Where Did You Get It?

He is more interested in getting your look than getting you. He talks about how he notices other men looking at his ass and then asks you, in an oddly perky way, if that’s normal. It's sad but true, this actually happened! This Mr. is an information gatherer because his secret dream is to look just like you and therefore he's not to be trusted. He is also somewhere on the Kinsey scale between 4 and 6; 6 being totally gay. Not helpful if you are looking for a heterosexual partner.

Mr. Oh! Baby...You Will Look So Good On My Arm

OMG! Let's go out! I can hardly wait to have people see you with me. Make sure you wear something hot! Such enthusiasm and flattery, so why didn't it feel right? We were only going for coffee. After the fact, I realized he had seated me in the most conspicuous spot, a high-traffic area, and was eagerly waiting to see if we were creating a scene. Pulease! Another Mr. wanted me to dress up really nice and follow him around town. We hit the hottest restaurant, went for a nightcap at a funky club and at the end of the night, to my amazement, he lost interest. Apparently I had fulfilled my womanly duties as arm candy. Next time he will have to call the Sugar-Plum Fairy.

Mr. I'm Not Separated I Am Almost Divorced

I'm so over her he says but she is still living in our house and I am paying the bills, and I can't just leave her on her own. She doesn't have a job and yada, yada, yada. This Mr. is still very emotionally involved with the woman he was, or still may be, in love with. This could leave you feeling more like a mistress than a girlfriend. Mr.'s like this tend to make you a lower priority in terms of how much time and money they spend on you. Something always seems to come up with the family and you won't be involved. When they do go through their "amicable" divorce, look out! Not many divorces are friendly ones. Don't get caught in the middle. This also rings true for men dating those women not divorced in a similar situation. Find yourself an available man, in every way.

Mr. I Am Renting Because I Haven't Had Time To Find A House

I meet Mr. and he says, I really like living here in the basement: it's easy to clean, I can travel more and it's easier when I move. This Mr. really means: it's easier to move when I get kicked out because my son is a druggie with a criminal record and has to live with me. The court mandated it. Now Mr. has to go out of town for an extended business trip (he didn't tell me he travels with his job). He calls from somewhere in the Southern Hemisphere: My landlord is pissed off and I'm not in town to find a new place and I have to evict my druggie son from my leased apartment and would you mind if I call your place home for a few weeks when I gets back? He calls again: my dog died at my other son's house and needs you to dispose of the remains. He won't, and by the way, my mom is having open heart surgery tomorrow (poor thing, she is 82 years old) so would you mind visiting with her every day until I get home in two weeks? It just gets worse. If you haven't figured it out, this Mr. is a con man. It's incredibly difficult to say "no" in a situation where you have been dating for a while and are asked for help. I could have been on Oprah. It's a long story.

Mr. Now You See Him Now You Don't

The date was fantabulous. What a couple we were. We talked for hours with excitement and glee, and then, he disappeared. When he reappeared (they always do) some time later (like months) the same thing happened. When he calls again and you reject him he just doesn't get it. Now you are a challenge (and these men love a challenge) and the calls don't stop. This Jekyll & Hyde behaviour is one of the many signs of a Commitment Phobia. You must omit if this Mr. won't commit or he may drive you mad.

Mr. I'm Not Extreme I'm Just Glad To See You

From the really nice Mr. who said "Thanks for sharing" after each and every time I said something during our date, to the man who was so excited to finally meet me that he spoke really, really loud (I was wishing everyone would stop staring at us and just get me some damn earplugs). And then there's the Mr. who turned everything that I said into a joke, so much so that I questioned if he could ever be serious. Ask yourself if these incidences are different ways your date tries to cope with his nervousness or are they annoying habits and a sign of worse things to come?

Mr. I'm Just Shy At First, But You Should See Me When I Am Tanked

I have never been so bored in my life. We spoke on the phone and he managed reasonable conversation, at least enough so that I agreed to a coffee date. I swear if I didn't do all the talking and ask all the questions, a word would not have crossed his lips. I knew then that he had sought me out; me, the gregarious, loquacious extrovert. A perfect, sort of, wing woman for him, someone who could make up for all of his horrid, sad years of being unable to communicate. I let him down gently. How about if I give you a call in the future? Perhaps you'll change your mind? He did call me actually, six months later, totally hammered, and chattering nonsensically about how much he loves me. I kid you not.

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