We all like to think that our relationships are evenly balanced, and that our partners care for us as much as we do for them. Unfortunately, it doesn't always happen that way. Sometimes, you find yourself suspecting that you care more about your boyfriend or girlfriend than they do about you. Or that, at the very least, you're more committed to the relationship than they are.
Starting to feel like your relationship is a little more one-sided than you'd like? Here are some warning signs that your relationship means more to you than to the person you're dating.
When he or she talks about the future, you're not included
If, when you and your partner talk about the future together, he or she doesn't automatically include you, you may want to start worrying. Somebody who is very committed to the person they're dating will generally see them as part of the future without having to make an extra effort.
You initiate contact
Do you find that you are always the one calling your boyfriend or girlfriend, or dropping by to hang out? If so, you may be letting your relationship get a little lopsided. People in a committed relationship should both initiate spending time together. If that's not happening, it may be time to evaluate why.
You're the one who compromises
There has to be compromise in every relationship; you just can't always get what you want. But if you find that the compromises in your relationship are always yours, there might be a problem.
You always put your partner's happiness first
But they don't do the same for you. If you usually give up the last piece of fried chicken, or do the dishes, or make other sacrifices for your partner's happiness, it is generally a good thing. That is, unless if your boyfriend or girlfriend never does the same thing for you. It's not really fair when your partner's happiness means a lot more to you than yours does to your partner.
He or she talks about other priorities
Everyone has a whole list of priorities in their lives, and the person they're dating doesn't always end up at the top of the list. But if your partner seems to consider just about everything of a higher priority than he or she considers you, your relationship may be a bit one-sided.
Unfortunately, the lopsided relationship is something that happens all the time. And while you can't stop loving or caring for your partner the way that you do, you can do things to change the balance of your relationship. It happens all too often that one person in the relationship gives too much, and the recipient of all that affection and caring begins to take it for granted. So you need to show your boyfriend or girlfriend that your affection doesn't come free; that it must be earned. Show them that you deserve to be valued!
Want to be seem more valued in the eyes of the people you date? Don't make yourself available to them all the time. When you constantly do what your partner wants, and are constantly there when they want you, you're almost begging them to take you for granted. You become the dependable, comfortable partner, not the exciting and desirable one.
Instead of revolving your life around your partner, work on filling it up on your own. If your boyfriend or girlfriend sees that you are your own person, one who doesn't depend on him or her to enjoy life, he or she will stop taking you for granted. Take that time and effort that you spend improving your partner's life, and improve your own. The rest should just fall into place. And if it doesn't, you've spent some time learning that you deserve better, anyway.
